This is me after all the “রঙ খেলা”. I enjoyed a lot with friends, went out with friends, played with color all day long. It was Fun. After a few coats of color, there was no place for anymore color. So, people went for আবির. It’s basically colored dust. And the variety of color of those is what responsible for me colorful face.
I was feeling low this morning, missed her a lot. That happened again when I was out with friends. A track was playing on the radio, she liked it a lot. Just reminded me of her. There are all these memory triggers, mostly the music. I wish she didn’t like all these popular music. 😀
I wished her birthday, maybe I was the first one to do so. I teased her while I was chatting online. Teased her about our relationship. I think we were enjoying it, but in the end, when she was gone, I again felt bad. I feel lonely still. Maybe it appears too exaggerated, but whenever I am alone, I think about her and I feel sad. Even among friends, sometimes, when I am not so much at home with the stuff we do, I again feel isolated and abandoned.
Today, I was talking with two brother-cum-friends of mine. They told me something I really like to quote. It’s from a poet by Tagore,
‘যাহার লাগি ছক্ষু বুজে বহিয়ে দিলাম অশ্রু সাগর, তাহারে বাদ দিয়ে দেখি বিশ্ব ভুবন মস্ত ডাগর’ and
‘মনেরে আজ কহ যে, ভাল মন্দ যাহাই আসুক সত্যেরে লও সহজে’
It’s like something new for me. I didn’t know Tagore wrote for heartbroken suckers like us. I gotta read this poem.
All I need is the assurance that she is there for me, and I don’t get that. And that’s the only thing that keep me dead inside. But the poem states some very true and obvious things, which I seem to like. Getting hold on life after this is difficult, and also with some many memories and memory triggers.
But still, “সত্যেরে লও সহজে” is the best part of the whole poem. Let’s see what I can do about it.